Christmas Traditions

As if you didn't already know, Christmas time is here!  Like really, really here considering it's just two short days away.  And being that it's so close it has me thinking about my family traditions.

Growing up lunch on Christmas Eve was always at my great grandma's (my grandpa's mother) with my mom's family including my grandpa's brother's family.  But as my great grandma got older that tradition faded out. It just became too much for her to cook a big meal for every one.

These days Christmas Eve is rotated between my parents', my aunt Pam's, and my aunt and uncle Maureen and Scott's.  This year we're at Scott and Maureen's.  We've also changed things up a bit and only do snack type foods instead of a full sit down meal.  This year I'm in charge of bringing the crab!  I always look forward to Maureen's mushrooms.  (I wish I had a name for them!)  Of course presents are exchanged.  And once all the gifts have been opened we get comfy and watch a movie together.  A few years ago we watched Bridesmaids.  I'm sure you know how funny the movie is but I think the funniest part was watching my great grandma (my grandma's mother) not quite understand what was going on (she can't hear well) when the girl in the wedding dress sits down in the street.  We all tried so hard to not laugh and we came up with something to tell her... I think.

Christmas Day we all gather again, this time at my grandparent's for lunch.  We fill our tummies with ham, mashed potatoes, corn/broccoli, and of course dinner rolls.  With full bellies we get comfy once again to watch another movie together and just hang out.

I'm sure you're all wondering what my immediate family does for Christmas traditions.  To be honest, it's changed over the years and hasn't always been staying the same.  Growing up we always got a real tree but the last few years my mom has adopted a little three foot fake tree.  The little guy just fits better into our living room and doesn't require solving a puzzle to find where furniture can be moved to in order to fit a full size real tree.

We used to always open presents Christmas morning and sometimes we still do.  But then there are times like last year when we opened our presents on Christmas Eve after we get home from whatever house we were just at.  I think part of it has to do with whether or not my brother has to work Christmas morning.  Or maybe it has to do with what church service we're planning to go to.  I'll be honest, sleeping in is one of my favorite things to do even on Christmas morning.  Sometimes it's easier for us to not have to worry about getting everyone (everyone but my dad will sleep in like it's no body's business) up in time to open presents and eat breakfast before having to shoo everyone off to get ready for church.

So maybe our tradition is that what we do is always changing?

Are we the only family that has changed our traditions or that doesn't stick to the same thing every year?

Weigh In Wednesday: December 10

As I'm sure you have all been able to guess based on my lack of posting, getting back on the healthy living wagon isn't going so well.  I'm always really motivated for a couple of hours or a day or two but then that motivation fades.  When the motivation fades it takes something called discipline to keep doing what needs to be done even when you don't want to.  Right now I am definitely lacking discipline.

I know I'm not alone in this struggle.  Even people who have been successful losing weight, like Carolyn, struggle with doing what needs to be done day after day in order to see results.  I've read this post a couple of times now and I will probably read it a couple more times to remind myself of what it takes to see results.  And even if I don't take the time to read the entire post again I will at least remind myself of two simple things.  "Motivation gets you to work out when you want to work out.  Discipline is what gets you there when you don't."

It's a relief to know that I'm not alone in the struggle to be disciplined when it comes to living a healthy life.  But yet I feel very alone because I feel like I am the only one that isn't getting it through my head that I need to be disciplined with working out and making healthy food choices if I want to see results.  I know what needs to be done and I know how to go about doing it but I'm still making excuses and talking myself out of doing what needs to be done.  And I won't lie, it's super frustrating and makes me think about giving up.  A lot.

But then I look at myself in the mirror, see a picture from a few years ago, or think about the plastic tote full of clothes that currently do not fit and I'm reminded why I want to change my life.  So I'm not giving up.  I will keep tying as many times as it takes for it to stick with me.

Height: 5'7.5''

SW: 213.6 215.6

Nov 13: 212.7

Today: 215.6

Change: +2.9

Woof!  What a kick in the gut that was.

Weighing In

Well hello there! Guess who's back?!

It's 9pm on Friday and I'm sitting down to write this blog post that has been a long time coming. Just call me grandma I guess because I'm happy to be in my pj's finally reconnecting with my blog. And I'm excited that I'm going to be linking up with two great link ups.

First up, Weigh In Wednesday! My last time linking up with July 30th. And I guess it's safe to say I "fell off the wagon" since then. It's frustrating to know that I've made absolutely no progress since that last weigh in. In fact, I have gained and have reached a new highest weight. But I'm not throwing in the towel yet and I have no where else to go but up (or down) from here!

Height: 5'7.5''

SW: 208.1 213.6

July 30: 207.5

November 13: 212.7

Change: +4.6

Raising the bar (in the wrong way) is a hard pill to swallow but I'm moving forward. I lost almost a pound from the time that I weighed in at my highest. And hopefully I see about four more pounds fall off before the new year.

Which brings me to my next link up!

The lovely Carolyn started a link up so that anyone pledging to get #fit4fifteen has a place to find support to reach their goals. Be sure to check out her post here and link up if you're joining us!

Like I said, I want to lose 5 pounds before the start of 2015. This can be accomplished if I stick to the plan which might need some rethinking now that winter has set in here in Wisconsin but overall is still holding true. I have a home run goal that I would be ecstatic to reach but it would take me on point every day. And I'll be honest, I'm human and I don't think that's possible for me. I'm going to enjoy some Mountain Dew here and there. I'm going to indulge in some Red Lobster (tomorrow probably actually). And I'm going to enjoy the holidays with the special treats that we only have once a year. But despite all of that, I can still see progress and end 2014 in a better place than I am right now, at least 5 pounds lighter.

Are you getting #fit4fifteen? Do you join a gym for the winter months or do you tough the weather to continue exercising outside?

Letting Go

Throughout my short twenty four years of life I've learned more times than I can count that letting go, while sometimes the best thing for me, is sometimes the hardest thing to do.  The hardest part of letting go is knowing that it's for the best but still thinking that I don't want to.

Today I'm talking about letting go of someone who isn't good for me.  I've actually mentioned him before here.  I called him The Player then but I think I'll just refer to him as "him" from now on. I'm not sure that the name I gave him then really fits what he is.  But please don't ask me what he is because I couldn't tell you even if I tried.  Anyways, back to the point of the story...

After taking some time apart, again, we've found our way back to each other again.  We've been randomly talking and even more randomly getting together.  I'm not sure what I was thinking by letting him into my life again.  Yes, I made some great memories with him when we first reconnected (and he was single) but those memories will always be there.  I don't need to continue to hang out with him to remember the good times we had.

After seeing him this past Friday night and having him text me in the wee hours of the morning Saturday to see if I was awake, it hit me.  And then I was hit with it again Sunday when The Single Woman tweeted, "Whether your phone rings at 2pm when he's busy or 2am when he's lonely should tell you whether or not he's right for you."  It was like she knew my life and knew I needed to read that.  He isn't right for me!

Whether your phone rings at 2pm when he's busy or 2am when he's lonely should tell you whether or not he's right for you.
— TheSingleWoman™ (@TheSingleWoman) October 6, 2014

Funny thing is, I knew this all along. I've known he's not right for me.  I want a man who will be 100% happy with me and not need to hang out with other girls (and clearly blur the lines of friendship) for whatever reason.  This guy is not that man.  So why do I keep letting him back into my life?

Probably because the dating aspect of my life doesn't seem to be going so great.  (Maybe more on the dating stuff another time.)  Essentially this guy is just kind of always around so when I'm feeling down about the lack of prospects in my life I like to feel like I'm wanted by at least one guy.  This is definitely not a healthy way to go about dealing with how I feel though so it needs to end.

And after this past weekend I've decided that it will happen no more.  I cannot continue to let him into my life to mess things up.  I feel like he pulls me back from the progress I make with being okay with being single and also with trying to join the dating world.  He won't make me happy in the long run and he's not what I want from a man.  It may be hard to let go of this safety net (if you could call it that considering that it isn't always preventing me from being hurt) that I have with him but it needs to be done.  It's going to be hard because I'm sure he'll try to talk to me again and make me want to give in to seeing him again.  Isn't it always though?  I deleted his text messages and I'll be working double time to remove him from my best friends on snapchat.

I even took it a step further and let go of the failed attempts at dating that I was holding onto in my messages.  Initially I kept them for blogging purposes (thought I might reference them for a post).  But then as time passed I realized it was past the appropriate time frame to blog about each of those failed attempts individually (where I would have liked to reference those messages) and that I was just holding on to them more as reminders of what didn't work.

I'm starting fresh with no reminders of the past and things that didn't work out.  I've let go and I'm moving on.

Do you ever struggle to let go of something/someone you know is bad for you?

Life Update

So I'm kind of terrible at taking pictures of the things going on in my life. Either that or I'm just really lazy I I don't actually do a lot of things. I'm working on it though {doing more and taking more pictures} I promise. But because it's a work in progress you'll have to enjoy this post sans pictures.

Anyways... here's a little life update because I'm sure you're all dying to know what I've been up to.

+ Way back in June I first mentioned I was taking a step outside my comfort zone at work and then in July I mentioned it again because it was interview day. Well I'm here to report that I did not get the new position (team lead) that I applied and interviewed for. I'm also here to tell you I'm okay with it.

+ I may not have gotten the position I applied for but I did get some new hours out of the deal. For about a month now I've been working 7:30a-3:30p instead of 11a-7p. I'm not a huge fan of the early wake up call (6a) but I do love being done with work at 3:30p and home by 4p.

+ I went camping in August with the parentals for 3.5 days and 4 nights. It was fantastic besides the unusually chilly temps we experienced. I'm talking some places were close to record lows in the 30s! I posted to Instagram more than normal during this vacation so be sure to follow me to check out those pics and to see what else I'm sharing. {Click here or slide on over to the right to click the button below my picture.}

+ I've been working on being a reading machine lately. I challenged myself to read 75 books in 2014 and thanks to GoodReads I know when I'm behind and lately that's all the time. {Click here to become my friend!}

+ I talked to the bank last week about my very first car loan and if things go according to plan I should have a new car by the weekend. It's crazy exciting but also scary as shit because lets face it, it costs a shit ton of money to buy a new car!

+ My last post was a Weigh In Wednesday post in which I shared my plan for how I was going to lose the weight. And then I took all of August off and have been way off plan. Well it's a new month and a new week so what better time to get back on track, right?

And that's pretty much all I've got for ya today peeps. My brain has been buzzing with things that I think I want to write about so I'm hoping those thoughts translate to "words on paper" for me to share here with you. Until next time...

Weigh In Wednesday: July 30

I'm back as promised!

Encouraging news from the scale these last two weeks. After getting knocked on my ass two weeks ago by seeing a number I've never seen on the scale these last two weeks have been slow progress away from that number. I skipped "class" last week and didn't post about my weigh in so this week you get a double. Lucky, huh?

Height: 5' 7.5''

SW: 208.1

July 23: 207.7

Today: 207.5

Change: -0.2

Total Loss: 0.6

It's slow progress but progress still so I'll take it!

Way back in June I posted about my comeback which was basically how I was going to get myself back on track with this whole healthy lifestyle thing. I wasn't quite successful with sticking to it even though I never told myself I was giving up. After some reflecting on why I wasn't successful in sticking with it I believe it's that crappy plan I had. I said it was the foundation that I could build on. Basically it was, just the ideas behind the plan I needed to build. With a little help from Carolyn I've taken the ideas behind the plan and actually turned it into a plan (built on that foundation I laid).

With Carolyn asking the questions and offering advice and guidance based on what I told her I came up with the following to be my plan.

Fitness

• C25K - T/Th/Sat or M/W/F or Sat
• Home workouts for non-running/strength (DVDs or Sworkit)
• No TV, laptop or reading until workout for the day is DONE!

Food

• 2-3 meals per week (ex. 2 recipes, 4 servings each)
• Winging it: protein (chicken, turkey, sausage, lean ground beef) veggie and whole grain
• 80/20 rule for better eating
• No Mountain Dew or ice cream will be bought from the grocery store.
• No Mountain Dew vending machine purchases at work.
• 1-2 (12oz cans) Mountain Dew on weekends ONLY.
• No gas station stops for Mountain Dew or grab & go food (junk).
• Monday = grocery shopping day
• 64+ oz of water a day

I believe this is a much better plan than what I came up with two months ago which was just the basic concepts of what I needed to be doing. Now I have some set "rules" to follow. And I use the term rules very loosely because life happens sometimes and I am not going to beat myself up over an indulgence that takes me off plan.

With that being said, I do need to remember to actually stick to the plan and push through when I'm not feeling it. I started off great last week by running Tuesday and Thursday as planned but then life happened and I missed my run Saturday. I had the opportunity to make it up but didn't. Then the plan for this week was to run Monday but I decided not to and told myself I'll just do it Tuesday since I'm going to be busy Wednesday after work anyways. Well Tuesday has come and gone and I did not run.

Going forward, so this doesn't happen again, when I'm on the verge of talking myself out of a workout I need to ask myself: do I want to give up (again)? Or do I want to be triumphant? And in addition to that I need to remember that letting myself live with trade offs (I stayed strong and said no to Mt Dew so it's okay that I don't run) is letting myself settle for where I am. My healthy decisions need to propel more healthy decisions and then I will see a change. (Thanks Carolyn!)

It's in my hands. The greatest support system in the world does not make decisions for me, I do. I have a great support system but they can't do a damn thing for me if I don't support myself and push through the mental garbage that gets in the way of doing what needs to be done.

I've been loosely following the plan I made and it's helped me to see the little changes in the scale these last two weeks so I can just imagine what would happen if I followed the plan 100%. I'm going to find out, that's for sure!

Quickly

Long time no see huh? I've been extremely lazy lately which has brought about an unplanned break from blogging. But as I was laying in bed this morning catching up on Twitter and reading some blog posts that were tweeted I realized how much I miss it. So I scrambled out of bed to find my glasses and fire up the old Toshiba with every intention of catching you up coffee date style on what has been going on in my life.

And by the time the lap top was fired up and ready to go I realized I don't really have enough time to even have a decent coffee date with you before I need to get myself ready for work. Yes, it's almost 10a CST right now and I'm still in my pajamas barely awake. See what I mean about being extremely lazy?

Having said that I'm going to plan on seeing all of you tomorrow for weigh in Wednesday and then follow it up Thursday with that coffee date we need so badly. And after that who knows what I'll come up with but I do have things I want to write about so we'll just have to see where it goes.

How I feel about today.

See y'all tomorrow!

Weigh In Wednesday: July 16

I'm going to make this short and sweet today for two reasons. First, I have about 13 minutes to leave for work and I still have to slap some war paint makeup on my face and brush my teeth before I go. And second, my weigh in kind of knocked me on  my ass this morning. But at least I was bit by the motivation bug yesterday so I'm ready to kick some ass!

Height: 5' 7.5''

SW: 207.7

Last Week: 207.7

This Week: 208.1

Change: +0.4

Total Loss: none

See what I mean? It knocked me on my ass seeing that I have reached a new high on the scale. Sure, it could be just a fluctuation that I caught on the scale and it's less than half a pound so it's not that big of a deal. But to see 208 on the scale, woof!

I still have plans to join Heather in taking measurements on the first weigh in of the month so starting in August I'll be able to judge my progress on something other than the scale.

Happy Hump Day friends!

Weigh In Wednesday: July 2

Before we get down to Weigh In Wednesday business, remember how I mentioned Friday that I stepped outside my comfort zone at work? Well today I take that a step further and could really use some positive vibes and your fingers crossed. And hopefully not too soon after today I'll be able to fill you in on what's been going on one way or the other.

Now onto the real business here, Weigh In Wednesday. I'm maintaining my highest weight which isn't the greatest thing to say but it's also not the worst. I'll be honest and just come right out and say it, I haven't really been putting any effort into this whole weight loss/healthy living thing. It sucks but it's the truth.

In addition to my own scale telling me that I'm tipping the BMI charts into being obese {isn't that a slap in the face?!} I had my yearly check up with the doctor Monday and she too reminded me of that lovely little fact. Thankfully my doctor didn't go ape shit on me that I've made no progress since the last time I saw her. I don't think I would respond well to that. She did talk to me about what my plate should look like, how much of each food group I should be eating and all that fun stuff. And without nagging me about she made it clear that I need to work on shedding the pounds.

With all of that said, I'm not giving up. I won't ever give up on myself.

Height: 5' 7.5''

SW: 207.7

Last Week: 207.7

This Week: 207.7

Change: none

Total Loss: none

My goal for next week is to see some movement in the scale {obviously a loss}. I hate seeing that I'm back at the beginning and my progress shows nothing. I think I'm going to join Heather in taking measurements on the first WIW of the month, starting next month. {Or sooner than that if I get my hands on a tape measure before then.} Hopefully then I'll see progress in another way besides the number on the scale.

Do you take monthly measurements to see results in other ways besides the number on the scale?

Friday Favorites

Introducing a post is hard! I've attempted two and they both sucked so now I'm just telling you how bad I am at it. I don't know how those that are really good at it do it. I must learn their ways!

Anyways, it's Friday so I'm going to share my Friday Favorites with Meet @ the Barre.

+ I managed to finally send a thank you card to my bestie for the week long vacation I took to see her back at the end of April/beginning of May. Her and her husband ended up buying me an unexpected dinner while I was there {we left in a hurry so the waitress didn't split the bill} so I sent along a gift card so they could have dinner on me some night. I killed two birds with one stone and made it a twofer thank you because she had sent me a birthday card with two gift cards. At least one of the two thank yous came in a timely manner. {It's something I'm working on.}

+ I took a step outside my comfort zone at work this week. I'm not going to say much more than that right now. You're probably wondering why I'm even mentioning it then but I'm really proud of myself for doing this regardless of the outcome so I wanted to share. I promise I'll stick with blogging on a regular basis long enough to come back with a report of how things turn out. {Anyone remember the last time I mentioned a secret and then didn't come back to share the good news? It was about getting my own place. Oops!}

+ Nights that cool down in the summer enough to make opening my bedroom window worth it. Knock on wood we haven't been having a crazy humid summer so far so while it reaches the high 70's/low 80's it's tolerable to be outside. Last night was the first night in a while I slept with my window open and it was glorious! So much cooler than being locked up tight.

+ Reconnecting with friends always makes my heart happy. Kelley from One Hot Southern Mess is getting back into her blogging groove and we've been catching up this week via text. I've missed this woman! It's never fun to realize that a friendship kind of fizzled out and you don't really talk any more. But the great thing is we've picked up where we left off. {At least I think so!}

+ Ordering Chinese food is always a favorite of mine. We're crossing our fingers at work that we've found a place that will deliver to us. If we have, I'm going to be a happy woman and I'll be happy dancing all day.

+ Pedicures with my momma. We have an appointment for tomorrow morning. :)

And one last favorite before I end this so I can get ready for work, blogging. As much as I'm terrible at it {super inconsistent if you haven't noticed} I really do love it. I have a place to share my thoughts and about the good and the bad in my life. And probably the best part, connecting with women that I would never have connected with otherwise. I've become friends with some pretty awesome ladies that I've never met thanks to blogging. It doesn't get much better than that.

Enjoy your weekend! Have fun and be safe my friends.

What's a favorite of yours this week?

Influenster: Go Vox Box

About a month ago I was lucky enough to receive the Go Vox Box from Influenster. Not sure what that means? In a nutshell I was selected to receive a box full of goodies for free to try them out. If you want to know more ask me. I can even send you an invite if you want to get in on the fun!

The PROFOOT Triad Orthotic you see up there I put into the Nike shoes I wear for every day stuff when I'm not wearing flip flops or sandals. {Now that summer is here that isn't very often at all.} I thought they gave a little extra cushioning to my feet and were comfortable to wear all day. Only thing is I think I could have used a slightly bigger insert because it was supposed to cushion the balls of my feet and it seemed like it was stopping just short of mine. Other than that I really have no complaints but I didn't wear them enough to really notice a difference in my body. {They're supposed to help with knee, leg or back pain.}

I've been meaning to give the PROFOOT Pedi-Rock a try but just haven't gotten around to it. I want to try it out in the shower after my feet have had some time to soften up but every time I remember it's sitting on my dining table after I'm in the shower. It seems like a great way to keep the feet looking great in between pedicures so I'm definitely going to give it a shot some day!

On that same note, the Aqua Spa Relax Bath Soak that I got is another item that I've been meaning to try but just haven't gotten around to it. I haven't soaked in a bath since I had chicken pox in elementary school. Maybe this weekend after I get a corkscrew to open that new bottle of wine I bought I'll have a glass and a soak.

The Playtex Sport Fresh Balance tampons were alright. Honestly, as long as we're talking plastic applicators {which it has} I don't really notice much of a difference between different brands. It did it's job and that's all that matters really.

I've never been a big fan of eating nuts and the only kind I really do snack on every once in a great while are honey roasted peanuts. That being said, the Blue Diamond Fruit Flavored Almonds {blueberry in my case} have gone unopened. I will probably give them to my mom as she does like almonds and maybe I'll try one or two. I'm not a fan of blueberries either so I really don't expect to like them but I'm okay with being pleasantly surprised.

Ah the Muller Greek Yogurt another item that I wasn't worried about trying right away {and still haven't}. I absolutely love the idea of yogurt, a healthy snack that can even serve as a cool treat in the summer or dessert when craving something sweet. That being said, my taste buds just do not like yogurt. I've tried different brands over the years and nothing changes it. I even tried to make myself eat a container once because of a UTI I had and it was recommended by the doctor. It didn't work out so well. The more I tried to eat it the more I hated it. Again, I'll probably give the coupon to my mom to give it a try. She's been stocking yogurt in her fridge for herself and my brother to snack on. Maybe they'll find a new brand they'll like.

And finally we get to The Vitamin Shoppe Next Step shakes. My first attempt with almond milk {first time trying that too} on the left came out really chunky. I learned though that it just takes a lot more shaking because my last attempt on the right came out much better. I hardly drank any of the berry mix due to the chunks and I drank most of the chocolate mix. This was my first time trying any sort of mix like this so I don't have anything to compare it to but I found even when well mixed there was a funny after taste. I also tried mixing the french vanilla flavor with cold water as the packet instructed. That did absolutely nothing for me. Again it tasted okay as I was drinking it but then that after taste it and I thought it was worse with water than with the almond milk. Is this just me or do other people notice this too?

Overall I was really please with the items I received. Maybe if I wasn't so gosh darn picky when it comes to what I eat I would have some new favorite snack items. Can't wait until my next vox box!

Recommitting

Look who finally showed up for class! Yay me!

As usual I don't have a lot of time because I was resistant to getting out of bed despite all of the things I wanted to do this morning so I'll keep this short and sweet.

Since my last post I celebrated my 24th year of life {a week ago} and have thoroughly messed up my comeback. I'm talking back to drinking a crap ton of Mountain Dew and no water, not giving a shit about what I'm eating, and being the biggest couch potato ever. Just to get it over with, here's my weigh in.

SW: 207.7
June 11 Weigh In: 204.6
Today's Weigh In: 207.7
Overall Loss: 0

I'm back at the beginning again which is super frustrating but really what did I expect when I just let it all go? The awesome thing is, I can start over as many times as I want/need to. I signed a contract with myself saying I WILL succeed, I CAN do this, and that I AM worth it. So I am not giving up.

Before I leave you guys I want to share a link to this post by the beautiful Ashten from Always Ashten. I relate in so many ways to looking at my workouts as fitness rather than my lifestyle. Workouts to me are about losing weight, "looking hot", and making the size of clothing I need go down. After reading her post I've decided that going forward I'm going to do my best to look at it as part of my lifestyle instead. It's just part of what I [will] do in my every day routine. That's exactly what it should be because as my weigh in proved today if I give up the good habits and revert back to my nasty old ones I will pack on the pounds again.

I have no goal date in mind for when I want to reach my goal weight. I'm on this journey for the long haul here people. However long it takes, it takes. This is me recommitting to that contract I signed with myself.

Did you struggle with having to start your journey over?

When it finally stuck what changed for you?

Feeling Off

It's really late in the day to be posting, like 10pm late. But despite feeling off all day, not sure if I'm getting sick or just not handling Mother Nature's lovely visit {to tell me what I already know} very well, I didn't want to miss recording a weigh in. Especially since I took the time to step on the scale when I almost didn't.

SW: 207.7

Last Week's Weigh In: 204.6

Today's Weigh In: 204.6

Overall Loss: 3.1

Holding steady is alright with me. As long as I'm not taking huge steps backwards I'm okay with whatever the scale has to tell me. I'm thankful that while I don't particularly like what the scale has to tell me right now I'm not obsessed with the number on the scale and it usually doesn't affect me emotionally a whole lot. So I know how I felt today wasn't a result of not seeing results on the scale.

Hopefully tomorrow is a better day and I feel more like my usual self. The bright side is we're over half way through the week so I only have two days to make it through at work before I can go home and enjoy more time with my family and my main guy Bo.

Motivation vs Determination

Last week I shared my plan for making my comeback to a healthy lifestyle. Getting started again is always the hardest but I know thanks to that plan that I have everything in place to succeed. Now I'm at step five, do it. Just doing what needs to get done is something I struggle with immensely. Setting goals helps me focus on one week at a time rather than the big picture and becoming overwhelmed. And thanks to Carolyn I even have a link up to help me along with my goal setting.

The three goals from last week...

1. 100oz a day. Wednesday and Thursday I killed it. Friday I caved and bought a can of Dew from the vending machine and that just knocked me off of my game. And Saturday and Sunday, you know the dreaded {when it comes to healthy choices} weekend, I only managed 20oz. I need to work on my determination to achieve this goal to not let silly little things stop me.

2. Two workouts. Woof. I ran Wednesday night for the first time in over a month, and on National Running Day woohoo. But after that I was a lazy bum. I kept putting it off by telling myself I would do it tomorrow. That didn't work out so well.

3. Make Santa Fe Chicken. Double woof. Again, I was a lazy bum and didn't get this done. I thought about it a lot but never just fully committed to getting it done.

Looking back at last week I learned that I need to really commit to achieving my goals. I start off strong with motivation right after setting goals but as that pumped up feeling fades so does my drive to make things happen.

Moving on to this week's goals.

1. 100oz a day. I know I can do this. I'm going to bribe myself a bit this week. I can only have a can of Dew after I've consumed those 100oz of water for the day. Seeing as I don't have any Dew in my apartment I'm going  to have to buckle down and reach that 100oz mark while I'm still at work to grab a can from the vending machine at work if I really want that Dew.

2. Three workouts. Last week I didn't set my goals until Wednesday so I gave myself a break. But not this week. It's time to suck it up and get shit done. I need to work out.

3. Make the damn chicken! No more pushing this off. It's a great recipe and I know I enjoy it so why not let myself have a good meal to choose from every day in my fridge? And when it cooks in the crock pot there is no reason why a lazy bum like myself can't get it done.

4. Clean the apartment. I've been meaning to do this for a while now but I keep putting it off. No more. I don't care if it takes me doing something every night this week but I will get my place cleaned up and looking good.

My motivation is high right now to accomplish my goals so I'll be putting that to good use but the real test will be when my motivation is low and it's time for that determination to kick in. I'm shooting for 4 out of 4 goals accomplished this week.

What are your goals for the week?

My Comeback

Can you believe it's June already? I can't. May just seemed to fly by. In fact the whole first half of this year has just been flying by. Before this next month and the remaining half of the year are over it's time for me to make my comeback.

I let my vacation derail me from my weight loss and fitness goals. Jessi wrote a post all about making a comeback that I'm finally going to put into action. So here we go, I'm going to put Jessi's five steps for making a comeback into action right here so you all can help keep me accountable and when I'm doubting myself or feeling lazy I can come back here and remember everything I said I would do.

Step one: decide to succeed. Consider this blog post the contract that I am signing with myself that says "I WILL succeed. I CAN do this. I AM worth it."

Step two: Realize that you don't need a miracle, you just need a plan. So many times in the past I have thought I needed a miracle because there couldn't be any other way I could lose the weight. Or I was always thinking there would be this miracle moment {moving into my own place} when everything would just magically click with me. But thanks to Jessi and Carolyn I'm beginning to learn that it won't take a miracle. It only takes me making a plan and sticking to it. This is my plan: weekly goals, meal planning, workouts, no less than 64oz of water a day. It's not a very detailed plan at this point but it's the foundation that I can build on. Potentially I'll be getting a 7 Day Jumpstart from Jess at Operations Skinny Jeans which would include 7 days of coaching from her, a clean eating meal plan, daily emails that include encouragement, a workout and tips for staying on track, and a private Facebook group with other jump starters. I'll keep you posted on whether I'm chosen to try out this free trial which is starting soon.

Step three: toss the junk, introduce the healthy. I drank the last Mountain Dew that was in my apartment yesterday. I'm going to try my best to not keep it around in the apartment now to tempt me. All of the other food in my apartment is mostly healthy so I'd say I'm pretty set on tossing the junk.

Step four: enlist your helpers. All of you are my helpers. Tammy Jo, Carolyn, and Jessi especially are my helpers. These ladies are always there for me when I need some encouragement, words of wisdom, support, and just a friend to be there for me.

Step five: do it. I have everything in place now. Today begins the journey that I will be on for the rest of my life. This is not a just a journey just to reach my goal weight. This is journey to change my life to a healthy one. Now it's time to just do the damn thing. Watch out world. :)

I know this post has gotten pretty lengthy already but it's Wednesday so I've got to share my weigh in. And really it goes hand in hand with this post anyways. This is where I'm starting from...

SW: 207.7

May 28th Weigh In: 204.4

Today's Weigh In: 204.6

Gain: 0.2

Overall Loss: 3.1

One more thing real quick before I end this post, three goals I'll be working towards achieving today through Sunday.

1. 100ozAday. I've slacked a lot with my water intake lately. No more. I need to be drinking water not empty calorie sugary beverages. I have yet to make 100oz happen on a Saturday or a Sunday but there's a first time for everything.

2. Two workouts. The weather forecast is looking gorgeous these next couple of days so I fully intend on taking advantage of it by getting outside and moving my body. I would like to make one of these workouts a run since it's been over a month since my last one. The second workout can be another run, a workout DVD, a walk...whatever. I just really want to get back on the fitness wagon any way that I can.

3. Make Santa Fe Chicken. I bought all of the ingredients to make Skinny Taste's Santa Fe Chicken but have been too lazy to make it yet. I don't know how much lazier I can be considering I make it in the crock pot and the most work comes from shredding the chicken after it's cooked. Must make real food this week!

Now I'm done. I swear. :)

TMI on a Thursday

Well would you look at that, I'm back again. And I'm so happy to be back. After all of the comments on yesterday's post I'm reminded of why I enjoy blogging, connecting with my readers.

To connect with y'all {sadly, I'm not from the South} a bit more I'm going to share this "TMI" survey I saw on Carolyn's blog a couple of weeks ago. As she said, it's not really TMI, just some questions that will let you learn a bit more about me.

1. What are you wearing?

Old, old shorts from my high school's football team that I some how got my hands on when I was a freshman and a Washington D.C. tshirt from last year's visit to see Chelsea. Pajamas man, I stay in them as long as possible.

2. Ever been in love?

I've thought so. I mean I've said I love you and stuff but looking back now I'm not so sure if that was really love.

3. Ever had a terrible breakup?

Any breakup is never a good one really. My last breakup {3+ years ago now. woof!} happened after my boyfriend came home from school for a weekend and didn't see me at all. Even lied to me so we wouldn't even see each other for a few minutes before he left. Finally over Skype {he went back to school} that week he ended things.

4. How tall are you?

5'7''

5. How much do you weigh?

As of yesterday morning 204.4.

6. Any tattoos?

Nada.

7. Any piercings?

My ears are double pierced and I have the top pierced once {whatever that's called}. I'm really horrible about wearing earrings so more than likely you won't see me with any in.

8. Favorite song?

How do I pick just one? Anything Justin Moore is for sure at the top of my list. I especially love Wheels from his Off the Beaten Path album.

Country Fest 2011

9. Quality you look for in a partner?

Honesty! Confidence and laid back but driven. {No one wants a bum but let's not be too hard core.}

10. Favorite quote?

"Don't be afraid to go after what you want to do, and what you want to be. But don't be afraid to be willing to pay the price." - Lane Frost (10/12/63-7/30/89)

or

"You've got to really want it all the way to end...If you run too hard you lose interest or you lose focus and you've had enough before it's over. You've got to pace yourself so the entire season is just as important from the start to the finish." - Dale Earnhardt Jr.

11. Favorite actor?

I enjoy Zac Efron. Like a lot. But who doesn't when he ends up shirtless. Am I right ladies?

12. Loud music or soft?

Well I love to crank it up in the car so I can have my own concert so I'm going to go with loud?

13. Where do you go when you're sad?

My couch to watch something on TV.

14. How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?

Well today will be pretty quick, I'd say 20 minutes. But if I'm going to be straightening my hair it can take a good hour, start to finish.

15. Ever been in a physical fight?

Nope. I'm a lover not a fighter. ;)

16. Turn on?

A man with confidence but not cockiness.

17. Turn off?

Cockiness and poor personal hygiene.

18. Fears?

Not finding "the one".

19. Last thing that made you cry?

Can't remember the last time I cried to be honest. I kind of teared up at the NCIS season finale with the good bye to Gibb's father. {The actor who played him died in real life.}

20. Last time you said you loved someone?

On the phone with my momma.

21. Meaning behind your YouTube name?

Well it's either because of my real name {personal account} or because of this blog {blog account}. How exciting, right?

22. The relationship between you and the last person you texted?

Tammy Jo and I are friends that met through blogging.

23. Favorite food?

Pasta and seafood for sure! Combine those two and I'm in heaven.

24. Place you want to visit?

Any where a blogging friend lives; Texas, Portland, Florida...

25. Do you have a crush?

Nope. Unless you count my celebrity crushes, like Zac Efron?

26. Last time you kissed someone?

Uhhh, over a year ago I believe?

27. Last time you were insulted?

Nothing specific comes to mind so I'm not sure.

28. Favorite piece of jewelry?

My Pandora bracelet and the necklace I got from my parents for my 18th {golden} birthday.

Well, I hope you enjoyed getting to know me a little bit more this fine Thursday morning. Now I guess I have to get myself ready to earn that paycheck.

My Confessions

Hey there! Nice to see you again. I know I have been MIA around these parts lately and I said last week you would see some new posts from me (and then I never showed up) but the important thing is that I DID come back!

I don't have a good excuse for why it took me so long to come back from my blogging break. If you've been around the blog at all you might know that blogging and my weight loss journey seem to go hand in hand. When I'm working out and eating better I'm blogging quite regularly. And then when I'm off the healthy lifestyle wagon I'm not posting, like at all. It's definitely on my to-do list of things to work on along with figuring out my why. But more on all of that stuff later.

I decided today was as good of day as any to link up for the first time to share my confessions so here goes.

+ I confess I haven't weighed myself since May 7th. I've been off the wagon and hiding from the truth about letting myself go. Until today. I got back on the Wii Fit board (and that little guy "ooo'd" at me so major side eye to him!) and was happy to see the damage wasn't too bad.

May 7th Weigh In: 203.5

Today's Weigh In: 204.4

Gain: 0.9

Overall Loss: 3.3

+ I confess to staying up until midnight (at least) every night for the past couple of weeks. Staying up late leads to staying in bed until 9 almost every morning. Sounds awesome until you realize all of the stuff you used to do in the morning before work isn't getting done.

+ I confess that I STILL have not written out thank you cards to the people that deserve one for helping me with my move...in March. I'm horrible when it comes to writing thank you cards in a timely manner, obviously. Let me just add that to the to-do list of things to work on ASAP.

+ And finally, I confess that I wrote this entire post on the Blogger app for my iPhone. I will have to edit this tonight once I'm home from work to add the buttons (confessions and weigh in Wednesday) and to post my weigh in stats.

Freak Out

I'm back! Vacation was great and of course I never wanted it to end. The only bad thing I have to report about vacation is I came home sick. Such horrible timing! But I'm on the mend and feeling better every day.

Vacation was a fantastic way to reset and come back to work refreshed. But now I also feel like I am starting over with running and changing up my eating habits again. If you recall I skipped out on running and grocery shopping the week before vacation so I am now trying to get back on the wagon after two weeks off. It's damn hard.

I lost the momentum I had going during the month of April. I know I need to just get out there and do it. But I'll be honest, being sick is holding me back. Grocery shopping really has nothing to do with being sick other than I just really felt like doing absolutely nothing since I got home Saturday night. Running on the other hand I feel like it does have a lot to do with being sick. I'm hesitant to get out there when I feel like I wouldn't be able to carry enough tissues on my short little runs to handle my running nose. Being able to breath when running is a requirement and with a cold sometimes that's hard to do.

So this post is me committing to myself and to all of you that while it's slow going I will be back on the wagon soon. I haven't given up! Just give me a little bit to regroup and catch my breath.

Before I leave here today I have to share my surprising weigh in results.

SW: 207.7

Last Weigh In, Apr 23: 205.3

Today's Weigh In, May 7: 203.5

Loss: 1.8

Overall Loss: 4.2

Freak out with me for a second, okay? Who takes two weeks off from exercise and really caring about what to eat, including a week of vacation which included eating out quite a bit, and then sees a loss on the scale?! I'm rather shocked. And I hope it wasn't just a lucky fluctuation of the scale this morning and that I can maintain the loss next week. With hard work I know I can. Here comes that first 5 pounds lost!

And with that I'm out of here. I need to get over to the jewelry store to pick up my mom's mother's day present!

Vacation Mode

SW: 207.7

Last Week's Weigh In, Apr 16: 205.0

Today's Weigh In, Apr 23: 205.3

Gain: 0.3

Overall Loss: 2.4

Not really much to report this week for my weekly weigh in. I stayed the same because less than half a pound doesn't really count as a gain in my book.

I didn't go grocery shopping this week because I really didn't want to deal with having to throw food away or eat it all before I leave Saturday. Not exactly the healthiest way to live but it's going to get the job done. {I have frozen waffles and cereal to live off of.} When I come back it will be back to meal planning and prepping!

As far as running goes I haven't pounded the pavement in a week now. I let that winter weather last week knock me off track and I just haven't gotten back to it yet. Horrible I know but with vacation ahead of me, knowing that I was planning to take that week off, I just feel like what's the point. I know that's not the right way to think about it but it's where my head is at right now. I'm not giving up on running, just putting it on hold until I come back from vacation.

I'm happy with my weigh in this morning considering I'm not putting in any effort to really lose weight right now. Now the real trick will be to see how I do while in vacation mode for a week.

Checking In

Well I hope y'all had a great weekend! I know I enjoyed mine since there was a bit more family time thanks to Easter Sunday. It's always hard to leave when the weekend is over.

I'm here to report how I did on my goals from last week. Before I get started I just want to say that it feels pretty great to follow through and achieve a goal so I need to remember that great feeling the next time I'm struggling to get it done.

[ONE] Run 3 times this week. This was not the goal I was feeling great about following through with that's for sure. I ran 1 time last week. Some winter weather came into play and I just let myself be lazy about it and didn't even try to make it up when the weather was better. Really all I have is a bunch of excuses for why this didn't get done.

[TWO] 64oz of water a day. This is the goal I'm feeling pretty good about. Last week I killed my goal 5/7 days. Two of those five days I reached 100oz while the remaining three days I reached 80oz. Weekends have always been my downfall when it comes to any of the changes I'm trying to make so it wasn't surprising to me that Saturday and Sunday I had no water. I managed to only have a Mountain Dew twice during the week and only after my goal was met. Huge accomplishment for me! But I made up for skipping a few days during the week by having two on Saturday and Sunday. So not a complete check on this goal but it wasn't horrible either.

[THREE] Sleep at least 7 hours. I knocked this goal out of the park! According to my FitBit I was actually asleep at least 7 hours every night last week. So huge check mark here but yet this doesn't give me as great of a feeling as that water goal does. Probably because it's not that hard for me to reach this goal. It just takes a little bit of conscious effort and it's easily done.

Moving on to this week.

[ONE] 80oz of water a day {Tuesday-Friday}. I totally skipped out on drinking water yesterday but I'm back today. I'm struggling with the last 20oz for today but I know I can get this done. Saturday I am flying to the east coast for a week long vacation to see my bestie and I couldn't be more excited. That being said, I know Saturday and Sunday I won't accomplish 80oz of water so for those two days my goal will just be to make sure I don't skip out on water completely like I did this past weekend.

[TWO] Clean my apartment before leaving Saturday. Not that my place is overly messy right now it just need some good organization and a run through of all of my cleaning chores. I want to leave my place neat and organized so when I come back the only thing I have to worry about is unpacking.

[THREE] Make a list for packing and start early. Chances are I can pack a good portion of the clothing I want to take on vacation because it's more casual than work allows {And it's warmer there than it is here!}. I don't want to be stressing about stuff Friday night so by starting to pack early and having a list will help. There are of course things that cannot be packed until after their used Saturday morning {make up, toothbrush...} so a list will be a huge help in avoiding something being left behind.

My goals are a little different this week but they're still focused on a healthy lifestyle. Less stress and clutter in my life this week leading up to vacation is just what I need. I want to be able to relax and not worry about a thing on vacation. Speaking of which, I should probably make sure I pay my bills before leaving no?

I'm off to chug the rest of this water so I can reach my goal for the day. {And probably regret waiting until bedtime because I'll have to get up a million times now.} I'll be back tomorrow morning with a weigh in. Let's hope Easter lunch doesn't knock me down!

Friday Favorites - Blogger Edition

Welcome welcome Friday! I might have to go into work today but I'm still glad you're here. After reading Jessi's post this morning I just knew I had to jump on this new link up. Especially because I had already planned to blog about some of my favorites anyways.

I want to spread the love and share with you who some of my favorite blogger ladies are. {In no particular order.}

First up is Jessi from Jumping JE. This lovely lady found me recently thanks to a link up and has been commenting on every post I put out into the blogosphere ever since. She's been incredibly supportive and encouraging even though she doesn't really even know me since our friendship is just budding. We are now snapchat friends so I'd say things are getting serious. We'll have to see where this goes but I definitely wouldn't mind maybe some day heading out west and visiting her in Portland! {Be sure to check out Jessi's second blog, Not the Average Bear, that's all about is all about balance in life which includes health and fitness.}

Tammy Jo is another one of my favorite blogger ladies turned friend. She's always there for me when I need advice or to vent about something. I am beyond thankful to have found her thanks to blogging and it's friendships like hers that make me thankful I stick with blogging. I would love to visit Tammy Jo in Texas, just probably not in the summer months since I'm pretty sure I would melt. I'll be the one to visit in the "winter" months and be running around without a jacket while those poor Texans think it's cold.

This next blogger is another one of those that is always commenting on whatever I throw out there for you lovely readers to read. Nikki is someone I could see myself being real life besties with. Almost everything Nikki talks about doing or wanting to do is something I would do or have done myself. She shares my taste in the men of country music as well. I actually mailed her a copy of the amazing Off the Beaten Path album by Justin Moore because I knew she just had to have it. Be sure to stop by her blog though if you enjoy almost daily Luke Bryan pics! {Girl, I promise you a dating stories post is coming...some day.}

And this last blogger I want to share with you awesome readers today is Carolyn from Fitnasty For Life. She doesn't have a button so be sure to click on the link to head on over to her blog. I feel like Carolyn has taken me under her wing for everything weight loss and running related. She answers my endless questions with no complaints {I hope!} and is always offering great advice. Her weight loss story inspires me and helps me to know that I can achieve my goals because if she can do it so can I. And now that I have taken up running her journey inspires me in that aspect as well. She's been running since the beginning so I know that I can start now rather than wait until I've lost a few pounds. So if you need some major inspiration in your life be sure to check her out. This lady is amazing!

I hope everyone has a fantastic weekend and that if you have today off you enjoy the three-day weekend! I'll see you all Monday for the Weekly Goals link up with Carolyn.